How to Orchestrate a Rehearsal

Here's a suggested outline you may find helpful if you orchestrate your own rehearsal:

1) Thank everyone for coming. (important first step, don't skip it!)

2) Ask them to quit talking whenever you... (pick your own cue, eg raise both hands, wave one over your head, whatever) You may not need this one, but it comes in very handy if you have three people telling you their thoughts about how to enter, who sits where, etc.

3) Have everyone stand where they will be positioned during the wedding ceremony. Bride and groom in center (as you are facing the minister, bride is on the left, groom on right) Arrange best man and groomsmen progressively out from the groom Arrange maid/matron of honor and bridesmaids progressively out from the bride ring bearers and/or flower girls *NOTE* one helpful suggestion is to have someone stand in for you so you can go out where the guests will be seated and direct the wedding party as to how you prefer that they stand. Some people prefer that they position their bodies directly facing the bride and groom. Others prefer that their bodies are facing the guests and they turn their heads towards the couple. And others prefer that they position their bodies towards the stage, turning their heads the other way. It is purely a matter of preference, and you may find that you really like one over the others. It's also helpful to have parents/grandparents be where they will be seated in front row(s)

4) Since every one is in their spots, talk (1) about how the exit will go. This is the easy one: Bride and groom down the aisle first Then the wedding party comes together a couple at a time and follows (first best man and maid/matron of honor, etc) Then the parents follow behind

*IMPORTANT* If you're going to have wedding pictures afterwards, then have the entire wedding party prepared to continue the recessional behind you all the way back eventually to the stage area. This will cut down the time it takes to get your pictures over from literally an hour or two, down to 30 to 45 minutes.

Since every one is in their spots, talk (2) about how the entrance will go. This is the challenging one: (every one has an opinion, the one that matters is the bride!) The beginning of the ceremony is marked by the seating of the parents / grandparents

a) Determine who will be escorting the mothers / grandmothers (usually the groomsmen/ushers) The fathers / grandfathers follow directly behind the escorted mother/grandmother

b) Once the parents are seated, the minister and the groom enter. The best man typically enters here too, but may alternately escort the maid/matron of honor. The groomsmen may also enter here too if they are not escorting the bridesmaids

c) Once the minister, groom, etc are in place the bridesmaids enter in reverse order

5) Now that everyone knows the plan, practice the walking out, including the parents.

6) Now you're ready to run through the entrance. This gives you a chance to see how you will each be able to determine when it's your turn to enter and what precisely you are to do. When coming down the aisle, dad walks on the right (so bride holds his left arm with her right). This means that he has to cross the aisle (sometimes walking back behind the bride's dress) to get to his seat. When dad and bride get past the first row of seats, they stop. Minister begins speaking then in very short time, I'll ask who gives this woman to be married (unless it’s NOT part of your ceremony. Dad (or other escort) answers (eg her mother and I) and then Groom steps forward and shakes his hand. Dad then takes Bride's hand and places it on Groom's extended left elbow. Groom and Bride step forward to their spots and dad sits down.

7) Thank everyone again for coming and run through any plans for dinner that evening. Make sure that everyone knows 1) what time they are to be there next day 2) how they are getting there and 3) any additional schedule items you have for them. Decide who will be responsible for bringing the wedding license and rings (someone other than Groom or Bride -- your only concern is to be there with bells on!)