Attitude

Food for thought:
Several years ago, Coach Joe Paterno and his Penn State football team were playing for the national championship against Alabama in the Sugar Bowl. They probably would have won, but they had a touchdown called back because there was a twelfth man on the field. After the game, Paterno was asked to identify the player. "It's only a game," he said. "I have no intention of ever identifying the boy. He just made a mistake."
--James S. Hewett, Illustrations Unlimited (Wheaton: Tyndale House Publishers, Inc, 1988) p. 214.

The story is told in Spain of a father and his teenage son who had a relationship that had become strained. So the son ran away from home. His father, however, began a journey in search of his rebellious son. Finally, in Madrid, in a last desperate effort to find him, the father put an ad in the newspaper. The ad read: "Dear Paco, meet me in front of the newspaper office at noon. All is forgiven. I love you. Your father."
The next day at noon in front of the newspaper office 800 "Pacos" showed up. They were all seeking forgiveness and love from their fathers.
--James S. Hewett, Illustrations Unlimited (Wheaton: Tyndale House Publishers, Inc, 1988) p. 218.

Self evaluation - How do you feel about forgiveness?

1. Forgiveness is an extreme demonstration of the power of God’s love. It allows relationships to be restored. It allows wrongdoers to be freed. And most importantly it proclaims to the world that love is more powerful than hate, good more powerful than evil, and especially that God is more powerful than the devil and all demonic forces. It is a privilege to pass on God’s limitless love through forgiveness.

2. Forgiveness sets us free from hurts of the past and so it’s worth the effort for important relationships.

3. God says we “have to”, so I do it to please Him.

4. I don’t think I know how to forgive, so it confuses me.

5. Hurt me once, shame on you; hurt me twice, shame on me!

6. Forgiveness is for cowards and losers!

Read the following verses and consider what mindset about forgiveness you would like to develop as a disciple of Christ.

Matthew 18:34-35 The master was very angry and put the servant in prison to be punished until he could pay everything he owed. "This king did what my heavenly Father will do to you if you do not forgive your brother or sister from your heart."

Matthew 6:14-15 Yes, if you forgive others for their sins, your Father in heaven will also forgive you for your sins. But if you don't forgive others, your Father in heaven will not forgive your sins.

What is your goal concerning the mindset you have towards forgiveness?

On what truth(s) do you need to focus?

How will you keep track of how you are doing?

What obstacles will you need to overcome and how will you face them?

Motivation

Food for thought:
Some years ago, after a vigorous brotherly and sisterly disagreement, our three children retired only to be aroused at two o'clock in the morning by a terrific thunderstorm. Hearing an unusual noise upstairs I called in to find out what was going on. A little voice answered, "We are all in the closet forgiving each other."
Robert C. Tuttle

Corrie ten Boom, in her book Tramp for the Lord had these words to say regarding forgiveness:
It was 1947--. I had come from Holland to defeated Germany with the message that God forgives. It was the truth they needed most to hear in that bitter, bombed-out land, and I gave them my favorite mental picture. Maybe because the sea is never far from a Hollander's mind, I like to think that that's where forgiven sins are thrown. "When we confess our sins," I said, "God casts them into the deepest ocean, gone forever--. Then God places a sign out there that says No Fishing Allowed!"

Self evaluation - Why do I forgive?

1. Out of a desire to see the power of sin broken. I sincerely desire for the offender to be released from the consequences of their hurtful actions to me. I want God’s love to be recognized by all. I hope that the release of the hurt will create an opportunity for my offender to repent.

2. I want the relationship to be restored.

3. So God will forgive me.

4. Don’t want others to think I’m being petty.

5. I eventually just forget about it.

6. I don’t forgive.

Read the following verses and consider what motivations for forgiveness you would like to form as a disciple of Christ.

Colossians 3:13 Get along with each other, and forgive each other. If someone does wrong to you, forgive that person because the Lord forgave you.

Mark 11:25 And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins."

What is your goal concerning the motives you have for forgiveness?

On what truth(s) do you need to focus?

How will you keep track of how you are doing?

What obstacles will you need to overcome and how will you face them?

Practice

Food for thought:
   On February 9, 1960, Adolph Coors III was kidnapped and held for ransom. Seven months later his body was found on a remote hillside. He had been shot to death. Adolph Coors IV, then fifteen years old, lost not only his father but his best friend. For years young Coors hated Joseph Corbett, the man who was sentenced to life for the slaying.
   Then in 1975 Ad Coors became a Christian. While he divested himself of his interest in the family beer business, he could not divest himself of the hatred that consumed him. Resentment seethed within him and blighted his growth in faith. He prayed to God for help because he realized how his hatred for Corbett was alienating him from God and other persons. The day came, however, when claiming the Spirit's presence, Ad Coors visited the maximum security unit of Colorado's Canon City penitentiary and tried to talk with Corbett. Corbett refused to see him. Coors left a Bible inscribed with this message: I'm here to see you today and I'm sorry that we could not meet. As a Christian I am summoned by our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, to forgive. I do forgive you, and I ask you to forgive me for the hatred I've held in my heart for you." Later Coors confessed, "I have a love for that man that only Jesus Christ could have put in my heart."
   --James S. Hewett, Illustrations Unlimited (Wheaton: Tyndale House Publishers, Inc, 1988) p. 215.

Self evaluation - How do I forgive?

1. I intentionally release my offender and seek restoration and I am committed to the process realizing that many hurts require a prolonged amount of effort in order to complete the forgiveness process.

2. I intentionally release my offender and communicate that forgiveness in the most appropriate manner I know. I seek restoration with that person for the future.

3. Intentionally decide to release my offender. It is as though I have to power to grant a pardon.

4. Forgive by forgetting – try to not remember it anymore.

5. Stay away from the person who hurt me.

6. Pretend like the offense didn’t really hurt me.

Read the following verses and consider what habits for forgiveness you would like to have as a disciple of Christ.

Luke 6:37-38 "Don't judge other people, and you will not be judged. Don't accuse others of being guilty, and you will not be accused of being guilty. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and you will receive. You will be given much. Pressed down, shaken together, and running over, it will spill into your lap. The way you give to others is the way God will give to you."

What is your goal concerning the manner of forgiveness you would like to demonstrate as a follower of Christ?

What relationship(s) do you need to improve the most by forgiving in a more Christlike way?

How will you keep track of how you are doing?

What obstacles will you need to overcome and how will you face them?

Consistency

Food for thought:
When Leonardo da Vinci was painting The Last Supper, he became angry with a man and lashed out at him. He even threatened him. Then he went back to his fresco and tried to paint the face of Jesus. He couldn't for there was too much evil stirring inside him. The lack of peace forced him to put down his brushes, go find the man, and ask his forgiveness. Only then did he have the inner calm needed to do the face of his Master.
--James S. Hewett, Illustrations Unlimited (Wheaton: Tyndale House Publishers, Inc, 1988) p. 217.

To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover the prisoner was you.
-- Corrie Ten Boom

He who cannot forgive others breaks the bridge over which he must pass himself.
-- George Herbert

Self evaluation - How often do you intentionally forgive others when they hurt you?

1. Daily and consistently and repeatedly if necessary with an intentional act of forgiveness when a hurtful action is taken against me and additionally a time of reflection to evaluate my heart for any unforgiveness.

2. Whenever I am aware that I have been hurt and need to forgive.

3. After I have cooled off for awhile and the hurt isn’t so fresh anymore, then I can forgive.

4. When I am asked for forgiveness and I feel the person is sorry.

5. Let little things go, but remember the really hurtful things that others have said or done.

6. Don’t forgive – hold grudges.

Read the following verses and consider how frequently you should forgive others as a disciple of Christ.

Matthew 18:21-22 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, when my fellow believer sins against me, how many times must I forgive him? Should I forgive him as many as seven times?" Jesus answered, "I tell you, you must forgive him more than seven times. You must forgive him even if he does wrong to you seventy-seven times.

What is your goal concerning how consistently you practice forgiveness to others?

When and where and who will you forgive?

How will you keep track of how you are doing?

What obstacles will you need to overcome and how will you face them?